I have to confess something I’m doing that can only be classified as “really, really LA.” Something a little more intimate, but something I have to share.

So I have this… moustache. Some butches think that’s cool, you know? Honestly, if I had a little goatee too, that would probably be awseome. I’d look very debonair.

But, I don’t. I just have my swarthy Scotch/Italian genes creating a very hairy upper lip. Since I was eleven years old and my big sister introduced me to the world of Nair and waxing, I’ve had to “groom” my moustache. Wax it. Thread it. Bleach it when the waxing and the threading made me break out.  Ad infinitum.

And I’m tired of it. Because it makes me look tired. And old. And not very well groomed, even in its gleaming-newly-bleached state, wherein it glows like the halo of the dawn breaking under my nose.

The clincher has been the commercial acting classes I’ve been taking – wherein I get to see many, MANY extreme close-ups on my face. And it just makes me look kinda dirty.

So – here’s the LA part – I decided to try laser hair removal. I consulted with an experienced friend. I bought a Groupon. I’m going whole hog.

And the funny thing is, when you’re doing laser hair removal, you can’t wax. Or thread. Or bleach.

All you can do is shave. Yup. They require you do stop all plucking and move entirely to shaving, because only with a close shave can the laser do its follicle-killing magic.

So I’m learning to shave! My moustache! Like, every day. I know of a few butches (and some femmes and straight girls) who do this regularly anyway, but I have never been one of them. Being already swarthy, I didn’t want to encourage any more dark whiskers, you know?

But shaving my lip is AWESOME, and makes me feel very manly and, well – fresh and clean. (Now that I’ve got the hang of it at least.) I have to do it every other day, but I dig it.  So far, the light hairs are still light and the dark hairs are still dark, regardless of the razor (which I know is the scientific truth, but I was still scared I was going to unleash some sort of sasquatch-dark-hair-trigger over my whole face somehow by doing this. I’m Sicilian. Anything is possible.).

So, thank you, ridiculous LA beauty culture, for providing me an entrance into laser hair removal, and the inherent butchness therein.


(PS – the laser hair removal is pretty good too. It takes many months to really work (more time to shave!), but the sessions don’t  hurt like I thought they would. A win-win so far.)