Hi all –

There’s a darker post coming, based on where my head and identity have been these past few days. To take my mind off things, however, I’ve taken to trolling the webs to collect some style ideas that make me pine, which I will showcase here.

Two things – as I’ve battled with weight and gender presentation, I’ve learned that 1) I don’t do well with cheap clothes. I spent years purchasing mens shirts and ties from places like Ross and Marshalls, and while you can sometimes find amazing stuff there, I’m such a specific size and build that usually it doesn’t fit me well enough to be worth it. I’d rather spend a little more on some good quality clothes that will last, and well made items can withstand a little tailoring if I choose to make them fit better. Which I usually do. And 2) trousers and pants are too difficult to buy online. There’s just no way of knowing how they’ll sit on your hips, so I’m sticking with shirts, outerwear, and accessories for this list.

I’ve been coveting a lot of Calvin Klein lately – I discovered their slim-fit cuts tend to work with my now-slimmer body better than most. In particular:

textured henley hoodie

For the weekends, or when you need an extra layer under a blazer and the college sweatshirt won’t cut it. Alternatively:

wool blend hoodie sweater

I love this one, particularly how long it is – when you’re almost 6′, you need some torso length. It might look weird with a bigger chest, though.

Same for these shirts:

graphic roll-up shirt

mini-houndstooth shirt

I always roll my sleeves up, unless I’m wearing the shirt under another layer. I find especially if I have a shirt that doesn’t quite fit my shoulders, rolling the sleeves up a bit gives a better impression of fit. I also love the dark buttons on the second one, and while usually I avoid shirts with pockets because of the bosom, with this kind of casual shirt I make an exception.

color block cardigan

I’m on the search for good cardigans, and so I’m lusting after this one. I prefer zipper cardigans (I’m not so much of a grandpa to love button-ups) with non-droopy pockets. They just look sloppy.

cobble striped vest

Vests, however, are another story. Vests are my current favorite fall layer. And this one is from Rag & Bone, one of my favorite labels.

If you’re looking for a little something fancy or unique, I’m excited about all the handcrafted ties and tie accessories that are popular right now. In particular:

antique bicycle tie


wind turbine ties

Because sleek graphics are sexy. (And eco-friendly.)


octopus tie clip

It’s an octopus! It’s a tie clip! I’m not steampunk but I love their style!

And in the spirit of “grandpa chic” (my┬áspecialty):

i heart argyle

I was really excited when argyle came back in last year. Yes, I’m trying to keep it alive.

suspenders with braces (button ends)

I am adamant about sewing buttons onto your trousers if you’re going to wear suspenders. Other than the fact that I believe butches should be crafty, clips have a tendency to let loose, and button-end braces just look awesome.

For an excellent butch gift, pair a set of colorful suspenders with a matching tie and silk handkerchief. Worn with a black button-down and black trousers, this look got me through about a hundred formal events in college.

And finally, I can wish for things I can never afford (not that I can afford any of this):

suede cap toe oxford

Sorry, smaller friends. These only come in my size and up. But I love them.

Same for these:

trent lace-up boot

For my britpop alter-ego.

Along with:

portobello navy plaid jacket

I almost can’t talk about this jacket. It’s from a UK store called Boden (land of grandpa chic).

And to top it off:

diesel wittor peacoat

Now, double-breasted coats often are too bulky for double-breasted butches. But look at this peacoat! The asymmetrical zipper pocket! The epaulets! Diesel also tends to cut their coats wide in the shoulders and slim in the hips, which does NOT work unless you’re twig thin, but the price tag is too high anyway. So I just look at it and squeal.

Los Angeles has made me a clothes-whore, and a fit-snob. This is the list that proves it. But: always better to be a dapper butch than a slob, no?